Every so often, I sit back and reflect on things that matter. Like myself and occasionally, other people who matter to me and a little
(and I am ashamed by this) about my God. This weekend was one of those weekends. I hang out with myself. I mostly napped and watched the children from the hood playing and ate a little and thought a lot. I switched off my data, left my phone in bed....to snooze, curled up on the couch, pretended to read, pretended to flip channels for a while, pretended to listen to music,
pretended to cook then eventually went for a long walk that totally killed my glutes
(after a walk that long, I now have a rough idea what glutes are......and ham strings). For 48 hours, I was going to sit down with me and enjoy who I was.
(sorry, commercial break)
This weekend got me appreciating a great deal of things that God has brought my way. I wanted to scream
'Hallelujah, praise Jesus' at many, many times over those 48 hours. So here are a few thoughts and things that I am very appreciative for.
1. My family: Being the only girl in an all boy band comes with various perks. They know all the good drinks in all the good places. They eat anything and everything so you never have a problem of food going to waste. They have cute friends that you can stare at when you are feeling blue. And...this is an important one, no matter how you react, they have only your mother to compare you to, so you are always safe. My parents are that couple who have been broken by their children's antics so they have become increasingly prayerful over the years. For their daily prayers, I am forever grateful. I have no idea what evil those prayers got me out of. And still are.
2. My friends: Try having no friends and you will appreciate the value of the dysfunctional relationships you have. There are people out there who know the colour of my tears, who have seen me drool in my sleep, probably heard me fart (
highly unlikely, but the probability is there), continued to love me when my hair was 'fire engine' red, kept me company when I was the most boring human being in existence, heard my snort-laugh. Then there are those who make fun of me, know my weaknesses and tag at them until they become strengths, get my foolishness and appreciate my blondness. I may not talk to them everyday, but when I do, its the best day in the world.
3. My God: Give credit where it's due and
Big Popa upstairs is really where all credit in my life is due. I have stopped worrying about things too much. He taught me that. I sometimes get worried I'll miss the office bus to work, then I whisper a small, hurried but very scared prayer and bam! He comes through. Or I think my cash won't make it through the month, then a debtor comes through or a job appears or I forget to eat for a couple of days. There are also a lot of big prayers I have prayed over the years, when I didn't really believe that prayers got answered. A lot of them are starting to be answered. Slowly, I am starting to believe in how great He is. Then I started praying for smaller things, and being grateful for even smaller ones. It's amazing how much I didn't notice was happening when I wasn't looking. The littlest things nowadays send me into bursts of joy. It's beautiful I tell you.
4. Myself: Well, it wouldn't be a ME weekend, without appreciating me. Appreciating who I have become, how far I have come. You know when people say
"You are stronger than you think"? It helps to believe them. I did not know how much I was capable of doing, of taking, of feeling. It has taken me a journey to get to where I am, and I am glad I held on...although barely. I am glad I can look back and appreciate myself for who I am. I don't ask too much of myself any more. I appreciate my limits and I also know when to challenge them. I sleep when I need to, I shut up when I'm required to
( sometimes ;-). And something new I have discovered........ I can now give and accept compliments
(Feel free to compliment me today.) and not feel too ashamed about it.
So should anyone ask where I am...................
I am right here feeling happy about nothing in particular.
(sorry, commercial break)
This weekend got me appreciating a great deal of things that God has brought my way. I wanted to scream 'Hallelujah, praise Jesus' at many, many times over those 48 hours. So here are a few thoughts and things that I am very appreciative for.
1. My family: Being the only girl in an all boy band comes with various perks. They know all the good drinks in all the good places. They eat anything and everything so you never have a problem of food going to waste. They have cute friends that you can stare at when you are feeling blue. And...this is an important one, no matter how you react, they have only your mother to compare you to, so you are always safe. My parents are that couple who have been broken by their children's antics so they have become increasingly prayerful over the years. For their daily prayers, I am forever grateful. I have no idea what evil those prayers got me out of. And still are.
2. My friends: Try having no friends and you will appreciate the value of the dysfunctional relationships you have. There are people out there who know the colour of my tears, who have seen me drool in my sleep, probably heard me fart (highly unlikely, but the probability is there), continued to love me when my hair was 'fire engine' red, kept me company when I was the most boring human being in existence, heard my snort-laugh. Then there are those who make fun of me, know my weaknesses and tag at them until they become strengths, get my foolishness and appreciate my blondness. I may not talk to them everyday, but when I do, its the best day in the world.
3. My God: Give credit where it's due and Big Popa upstairs is really where all credit in my life is due. I have stopped worrying about things too much. He taught me that. I sometimes get worried I'll miss the office bus to work, then I whisper a small, hurried but very scared prayer and bam! He comes through. Or I think my cash won't make it through the month, then a debtor comes through or a job appears or I forget to eat for a couple of days. There are also a lot of big prayers I have prayed over the years, when I didn't really believe that prayers got answered. A lot of them are starting to be answered. Slowly, I am starting to believe in how great He is. Then I started praying for smaller things, and being grateful for even smaller ones. It's amazing how much I didn't notice was happening when I wasn't looking. The littlest things nowadays send me into bursts of joy. It's beautiful I tell you.
4. Myself: Well, it wouldn't be a ME weekend, without appreciating me. Appreciating who I have become, how far I have come. You know when people say "You are stronger than you think"? It helps to believe them. I did not know how much I was capable of doing, of taking, of feeling. It has taken me a journey to get to where I am, and I am glad I held on...although barely. I am glad I can look back and appreciate myself for who I am. I don't ask too much of myself any more. I appreciate my limits and I also know when to challenge them. I sleep when I need to, I shut up when I'm required to ( sometimes ;-). And something new I have discovered........ I can now give and accept compliments (Feel free to compliment me today.) and not feel too ashamed about it.
So should anyone ask where I am................... I am right here feeling happy about nothing in particular.
Very nice read. You always make my day
ReplyDeleteCompliment: you write well.
ReplyDeleteI saw a quote somewhere about people being afraid to just be still or something like that. We have so much to avoid boredom but once in a while it's good to just chill!