Leap Of Faith

(I really don't want to write this post!-That's what's going through my head. But some things are important. This is important)

"What do you think you will find when you make that leap?">

That was the question that changed my life. It was that simple.I had been battling with the decision for a long time. Everything pointed in that direction but I just couldn't take that step. It's safe on the cliff, you know. It's solid and you can feel the ground beneath your feet. You can tell what is where. You have a choice to sit and ponder or to walk away and forget totally that you hovered on that cliff in the first place! Or....you have a choice to jump.


"What do you think you will find when you make that leap?">

I muttered a bit. I stuttered a lot more. Until the point the question was asked, I had just been seeing darkness. I'm not the biggest risk taker. God knows I prefer a plan I can manage from A to Z. I need to know what will happen next so that I can plan ahead for it. But this was different. I couldn't know what was next. I couldn't even begin to perceive what was next. I had to give up the power I held so closely to my heart. I had to give up my fears. I had to give up everything.


"What do you think you will find?">

This question that had been asked by someone I had only just met. She asked it with such assurance and confidence. Such calm. She wasn't taking my confused musings as an answer. She peered into my eyes. It's like she was seeing my very soul. She needed to see what I saw. What I imagined life would be like when I let go. When I stopped planning ahead. When I stopped "interviewing" everyone and "comparing" notes. She needed me to see it. To see what it was like over the cliff. Away from personally imposed comforts. I fell silent.

"What do you see?"

I had bunjee jumped before. I had done stuff that required some level of faith. What did they say? Fear drives away all faith. Now all I felt was fear. Could I jump and not look back? Would I crush underneath the weight of my mistrust?


"What?"

Then I finally started seeing something. On that beautiful day in the backyard eating chocolate cake. I actually started to see something. Full flight. Faith didn't mean holding onto ropes or pacing by the edge. The edge is just as scary as the jump. Faith means jumping and knowing you will fly. Knowing you won't crash and burn. Knowing that that scary pit will never see your feet.


"What did I see?"

I finally saw full flight!

And that's what I told her. So she smiled. And that's when I eventually told HIM! That he gives me full flight.