Shameful! Just shameful!

"Calling on the name of the Lord doesn't make what you're praying for right!"

I should know. I have prayed for alot of nonsense in my time. Maybe its so that I can clear my conscience and I admit sometimes it's so that I get forgiveness before crimes are commited. But there are some things that I know are wrong and if there's a prayer I am going to pray is "I'm sorry"

The tribe I hail from has rather crude talking habits. I have to admit. We are at pains to find words of courtesy. Thank you, I'm Sorry, Forgive me, nothing.... a pretty harsh tribe if you're the overly-sensitive type. But we have slowly come to learn that it is important not only to be courteous but to admit to your mistakes and wrong doings. So we have adopted other languages to incorporate these words. I guess my ancestors learnt that some words cannot be lived without.

I was listening to CapitalFm a few minutes ago and one prolific politician or clergyman (at the time I didn't know which) declared that "Shetani ameshindwa" (Satan has been defeated) and I just wondered, how often is what we do blamed on the devil. I heard a story of a thief who had been caught stealing offering baskets. Upon being asked why he did it, he replied with tears: "The devil made me do it." I thought it was a hilarious story but we could all tell, after all excuses have run out, we blame the devil.

If I sin or commit a crime, however small and God decides to forgive me without my asking or confessing, do I go screaming the devil has been defeated or do I ask for forgiveness and promise never to do it again? I think it is important to tell the difference between faith and arrogance. Sometimes we confuse the two. Just because I prayed, it does not mean that whatever I did becomes right. It is still very wrong. More so now when I know it is wrong.

When forgiveness comes it is not meant to be a show of arrogance. Its not a time to show how awesome you are as a person. It is a time of humility. A time to accept that someone else saw it fit not to punish you to the full extent of your crime. We tend to think, just like the Ocampo6, no matter what our wrongs are, we can just be running back and forth to God to fix it so that we can run back and do the same offence. God is not an antiseptic neither is He your everyday rehabilitation center. Even with antiseptic, you have to apply it in the correct place for it to heal your wounds. So in the same way, when we do wrong, we have to to confess the correct sin to expect forgiveness. In fact what I should be saying is we have to confess first.

Having a powerful man of God place his hands on your head for "show" does not make you automatically forgiven. It does not make the people watching you endear themselves to your hypocrisy. If anything it angers them even more. I don't know whether it angers God as much. I can not speak on behalf of His mercy but I don't think He likes being taken for a fool. I do believe it has to be genuine and sincere. And sincerity is not shown by insulting other people,innocent or not, in your prayers. An insult is an insult, whatever context it's put in. We forget all too often that this same God who gave to us grace so generously can just as easily take away. That as much as we may try to blind side with other theatrics, He still knows what you did (last summer and the summer before that!)

This is not just for the politicians who if it were left to me, I would strike with lightening. But this is for me too. A person who believes that if I ignore a situation long enough, I may never need to repent and hence my conscience will be clear. My conscience should never be clear of things that I have done wrong. Never. And I should be ashamed for not having the guts to admit that I need forgiveness when I need forgiveness. To think that I can deceive those I have done wrong by throwing my faith in their faces. Throwing the name of God in their faces. Shameless. Just shameless.

That is a sin in 2 counts in my book and in God's book:

You have used the Lord's name in vain (Ex 20:7)
And you have lied (Ex 20:16)

Whether you feel like it or not and whether you think you are in the wrong or not, putting yourself in a place of humility gives you a power you can never experience unless you try. It teaches you that with every deed we do, whatever it may be, that there shall be consequences and regardless of consequences, we must be ready to do the right thing by others that we may have hurt first, and then by ourselves. Humility has to be learnt and embraced. It may not be for all of us but the least we can do is show we are trying to humble ourselves. Trying to own up to our mistakes.

We have become a shameful nation where we believe that all that is needed is for us to show up with a pastor in tow and it automatically abdicates us from our crimes. I believe this is not just happening with the people in power, even us little people down here are using such antics to cover out mistakes. Such antics may work for the brain washed but for the people who see our souls, they may never say it but they will be waiting for you to own up to your mistakes. There are some things we can laugh off but not all people are equal and some people may not find it as easy as you do to find humour in all things.

So next time you are about to steal someone's favourite pen in the office, stand someone up on a date without apology, hold a grudge over some little thing, drive over your neighbour's flowers, hold loud prayer meetings at night or whatever, just think if you are ready to ask for forgiveness from those you are openly make suffer. Or whether you will bring your Bible study group to come and condemn them for daring to "talk back to" a "Child of the Almighty" or be banished to the "fires of hell" If you aren't maybe you should just not do it.