The Choices we make.

We are given the power of choice. The power to choose what is right, to choose whether to do wrong. There's no better time to make choices than during a transition. A new year, a birthday, a wedding, a new baby, a relationship, a job. Every new transition, every new change, gives us a chance to make brand new choices. Not the little ones like what you eat for supper or what you wear in the morning. But bigger choices, about who you are, what you want to be, where you should be. You plan, you choose.

So as we begin this new year, as we take these last few steps towards a new transition, we need to think critically about what our resolutions are. Because the resolutions we make. Right or wrong, good or bad, they shape what we believe this next year will be. What we believe we shall be in this next year. Whether your resolution is to change jobs, lose weight, drink less, become a better person all together, its a silent word of faith as to what you think and hope for 2012. A silent word of faith to yourself.

The reason, I believe, most of us fail at these "resolutions", these choices is because we have little faith in ourselves. In our ability to change. We are afraid to disappoint ourselves, to disappoint our loved ones and sometimes even to disappoint our enemies. We are afraid to fail. We are afraid to think less of ourselves.

But every new year we make them anyway. Because we believe that every year this is the year we shall change. The year we shall become better, bigger, richer, leaner. Sometimes, we make them in jest, so that others don't see that failing to meet them sometimes hurts us a little more than we are willing to admit. But every resolution whether personal or public is a deep desire to change and improve who we are.

Sometimes pain holds us back though. Keeps us from desiring better of ourselves. Makes us think we don't deserve better. So we resolve not to change. Not to improve. But we resolve none the less. And sometimes we have to make harder resolutions than normal. As we resolve to leave our past behind and let go. As we hold onto memories that we need to carry forward. As we resolve on what to forgive and what to forget. Not only of others but of ourselves as well.

But whether its the beginning of a new year or the turn of a new age, the change of a new job, the addition into a new family, whatever that new transition maybe, we all have choices to make and whether we admit it or not, we all make them. Choices about ourselves, choices about how we treat others, choices about how we want others to treat us. We need to remember though, every choice is ours to make.

So for the first time in many many years, I am making a couple of resolutions of my own. Hopefully to make me a better person. Resolutions have scared me before, because I have hated disappointing myself. Failing myself. They expose my weaknesses. But this year, I join the rest of the world in making a few choices of my own. I put my faith in myself but more so in God, that every resolution I make today, tomorrow and on the 31st shall not be made in vain or in jest...but in faith.

Every new transition deserves some new choices. So I ma writing mine down. On line at a time. Let's just hope this year, we stick to those choices.

#Godspeed.

New Beginnings...(again)

A year has flown by. Suddenly I almost can't differentiate January and July, Rain and Sunshine. It went by in a blur. From the first day this year, I have not anticipated anything that has happened this year. Not the good, the bad, the beautiful. Everyday was a little adventure. Sometimes pasted with boredom, sometimes with excitement. From handling my first major client to failing businesses. From the death of Jobs to the death of Osama. From the top of Mt. Kenya to the beaches of Mombasa.

So I wonder what next year might bring. What kind of resolutions am I prepared to make for myself and how many am I willing to keep.There's one resolution though I am hoping to keep. That next year I should be a little more Christ-like. A little bit more love-filled. A lot more expressive. A tad less suspicious. 2012 will be a year of joy, peace and joie de vivre. Stressing out this year has taught me:

1. Stress costs money
2. Stress costs relationships.
3. Stress costs health.
4. Stress never repays debts.

So if you shall; join me in not sweating the small stuff this coming year, embracing the big moments, letting the bad moments slide, loving life as it develops and trusting that most people, even in their mistakes, mean well.


So this is my words for me this coming year:

1 Corinthians 13

1) If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2) If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3) If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4) Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5) It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6) Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7) It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8) Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9) For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10) but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11) When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 1)2 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13) And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Thank you for keeping me sane this year, for the company, the friendship, the love. From both known and unknown people. Let's jump into 2012 dressed nothing but love.

#Peace

Imprints

I was walking home last evening, happily dreaming in my own world, when I noticed very deep animal prints. There are a lot of animals where I live so it is not strange to see hoof, paw and other foot-like prints. But these ones were different. They were deep, almost like it was deliberate to leave them there. Like they wanted to leave behind something more permanent than just a print. Like they wanted to leave a mark. I was here and even if I will not be back, I was still here. It got me wondering, Do I leave footprints where I walk?

We seem to forget how deep a print we leave behind when we eventually walk away. Some times its like a print in the sand; a gentle breeze and it is gone. Some times its like those prints in the mud; deep and ingrained. We live in a generation where we are forever moving. Moving jobs, moving relationships, moving countries, moving homes, moving careers, just generally moving on. You end up leaving behind so much of yourself everywhere. So many memories, so many imprints, especially with the people who care most about you.

We leave things behind. Our clothes, our homes, our friends, our things. Everything we are, gets left behind every time we move. But its not the things that leave the imprints, its not about the cars and shoes and posters, but the memories that those things bring. The way we smile, the way we walk, the way we tilt our heads, the way we kiss, the total sum of our personalities. It is encompassed in the places we've been, the things we have and the words we say.

The computer I work on in the office is the slowest thing in this office. Partly because it is old but partly because it carries so much from so many people long gone. Most of these people mean nothing to me but sometimes a colleague will come to look for something on the machine and randomly drop an anecdote about the previous owner. That is because that is the footstep they were left with. The guy who used to never talk at the corner, the girl who used to argue with the boss, the head of department who always went home with the company car when it was needed,the intern who always had a witty comeback.

Imagine that is just the office. Now imagine what kind of impact you have had out there in the real world. Some times you are like a car crush. You walk away after leaving such chaos, you are absolutely impossible to forget. A black spot. (like my former boss *shivers*)Sometimes you are like a gentle hug. A place everyone wants to retreat back to. (like a beach) But regardless of how you decide to live your life, you move around living your footprints all over the place.

I had an ex-ish, a long, long time ago, who had just relocated from the UK, and he couldn't drive to save his own life. But that man loved the Prado. He constantly used to talk about, when he eventually learns how to drive, he would get himself a Prado. Nowadays, whenever I see a green Prado, my mind automatically remembers him. The Prado was what he imprinted in my mind. And this is someone I haven't seen in almost a decade. There are much bigger and more important people that have featured in my life since then and just entering into a club, or seeing a mutual friend, sends me down memory lane. Just someone who looks remotely like them, or a certain smell will put a smile on my face.

We need to be careful where we put our feet and what kind of print we want to leave in our wake. We may not know it, but people are talking about you long after you have left. The guy who used to abuse the watchman, the girl who wore shoes way too high, the pal who is forever taking photos, the friend of a friend who drove a tad too fast from the club and climbed on the planters. Always when a story is being told, you shall reappear in people's minds. In people's thoughts. But you have to think about the kind of depth you have left behind, what kind of print you make, is entirely up to you. You never know how much you have lived until you have actually left.


Just saw this:"I just saw a guy with a beard exactly like my dad's. I doubt it was his though; dad never let anyone borrow his beard."hihihi!